Category Archives: Love

Him

There are a few different phases of heart break.

1) “Denial.” You refuse to admit to yourself what had just happened. It seems easier to sit with the disbelief than to accept the reality. After all, how could someone who is such a big part of your life just let you go. Maybe it was impulsive, you think to yourself, I’m sure he will appologize for it any second and everything will be okay.

2) “The crying.” It hit you. You now understand that he’s gone. He meant it and he is no longer a part of your life. You feel as though every organ in your body has dropped on top of your stomach and you can’t help but curl up into a ball and sob. You wipe the tears from your eyes and when you look around. . . everything reminds you of him. The pj’s you’re wearing; his. The CD your listening to; his. The christmas present you step on by mistake; his. You just can’t seem to brush the thought of him out of your head.

3) “Food.” For some reason a big bag of pretzels, a tub of icecream, and some oreos are the perfect dinner foods for you for about four days. And that stomach ache you once had, well it’s still there. But, now at least you know its from food and not heart break.

4) “Distractions.” You do everything in your possibility to forget this guy. After all, he’s probably having a great time with his friends, not thinking about you and doing just fine. So you should do the same, right? You go to school, work, a coffee shop; anything to get out of the house. Then, suddenly you realize you have tons of free time! You try and fill your whole schedule with girls nights and coffee dates.

5) “Canceling.” You then remember that you are heart broken and all you want to do is repeat steps two and three. So, you tell your friends you “are not feeling good” or “have tons of homework” or “forgot you had to work that day”. But, to your closest friends you tell them whats really going on. And that leads me to step 6. . .

6) “The over thinking.” You begin to tell all of your closest friends about the break up and you analyze everything you did in the relationship. You complain and tell them it’s “all my fault” and they reply by telling you it’s not and explain everything he did wrong. You now feel a bit better knowing that not everything is your fault and maybe you are better off on your own.

7) “I’m fine!” You have regained your sense of independece. Who needs someone else to make you happy! You begin to tell yourself that you are okay and you even start noticing other cute boys. You convince yourself that he isn’t missing you, so you refuse to miss him.

But. . . then there is that one thing. That one song on the radio. The commercial on TV for the movie you saw together. His sweatshirt you find in that pile of clothes.

You then begin to miss him again.

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